Friday, June 28, 2013

"If you're wonderin' who's got the smallest dick in the world..."

"...well yah seein' it right now. So don't ever expect to see it again!"

So opens the greatest live show ever bootlegged to 7" vinyl, GG Allin's Live... Carolina In My Ass. C'mon did you really think I'd let the 20th anniversary of everyone's favorite scumfuc's death go unnoticed? Here's a great 15 minutes of classic Allin, starting with the epic "Diarrhea Blues". It seems North Carolina caught GG on a good day - he's almost a fucking comedian during the song's bluesy five minutes - the band respectfully holds it together as GG goads the audience and shits all over the place (hearing that confused redneck yell "he's taykin' a shee-yit!" is absolutely priceless) all without missing a beat. But don't take my word for it - here's Jeff (ANTiSEEN) Clayton's liner notes:

"Oh well... it was very, very hot in this very small cinder block building once an actual church, now a club called "The Church". Only 2 doors to get out of, one in back that stayed locked and one... right beside the stage. He comes out, bloodies his face, fingers his ass, kicks a few bystanders, shoves a Fleet enema up his ass, shoots the dirty water all over the place, squats down in the middle of the crowd, shits, throws it everywhere, eats it and scares the fuck outta the 120 little hardcore kids who earlier bragged about stomping his ass... so... time for the second song. As the show which lasted about 35 mins. went on he blow snot, started fights, stuck a mic up his ass... pulled on his dick, spit, started more fights... attempted to rape some bitch and still scareing the fuck out of what now is about 30 people. So on the last song 3 or 4 brave audience members jump him and get they're asses kicked. All the equipment is toppelled and we rush him to the car + to the hotel. Whew... what a night. I'll never forget it. Nor will anyone else who was there. The church is now an actual church again. Man... if they only knew... godamn."

And the kicker about this record are the songs - who'da thunk GG would pull "Out For Blood" from the archives for a live show? Cool rare, random stuff from a guy who was about to cut his record deal with Homestead and start down the dark drunken path to prison. Would GG still be relevant today? I'm too drunk to get in to the conjugatin' and proclamatin' but let's just say the world would be a better place if he was still out there fucking shit up. RIP motherfucker.

Currently watching: Repulsion
Currently listening to: Carnifex Dead In My Arms

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