Aussie Slam

Lets start off 2016 with the first full-length by Melbourne brutal death metallers Whoretopsy. The band caught my eye sinply for the fact they call themselves a blend of deathcore and BDM, two genres which I'm trying to get back into after being out of the intestinal loop for a couple years. So how does the merging of such misanthropic styles sound? Pretty fucking good actually. First off, it is really nice to hear good musicians actually playing together, no drum machines, loops or over produced effects. The riffs and breakdowns are plentiful and absolutely vicious - the kind of stuff I wish there were still huge floor-sized speaker stereos to blast through. The weird deathcore guitar noodling (of which I never understood the popularity) is still there to an extent but it's completely overshadowed by the sheer crush of down-tuned power chord monstrosity. You still got to deal with a token movie sample intro on most of the songs but hey it wouldn't be brutal death without 'em, no? Great shit to nurse a hangover and rip the holiday decorations down to. Happy New Year.

Potty Mouth

Pathologically Explicit

Ah, nothing creams holiday spirit like a 30-minute dose of Spanish brutal death metal. Straight outta Lleida, Catalonia comes Haemophagia. I don't know what got into me over the last few weeks but man I was getting tired of the pussy shit that kept popping up on my iPod and felt it was time to find a new BDM band. Originally spawned in 2005, the trio began life the sorta-stupidly named Triskaidekaphobia (technical term for fear of the number thirteen), recording a 3-song demo and eventually settling on their current moniker. While the "low" guttural vocals are a tad bit lower than I'd prefer if I was mixing this myself, it's still a great album and one that isn't marred by shitty production, a tinny drum machine or endless movie samples. The breakdowns are heavy and plentiful, the song titles are meaningless and offensive, and while there's nothing you haven't heard before it's performed by a bunch of guys who know their death metal history and play what they like. Break out the egg nog and throw this disc in the CD player for a cozy night of holiday cheer. Enjoy.

Appealing Obliteration

Contemplating Death

Wow, it's been a while since I've posted anything "heavy" on the ol' blog (much less posted anything at all but that's a different story) so a big welcome to the creepy month of October with a 38-track slab of good ol' pathological goregrind to ruin your day. I gotta admit I was pretty excited when I heard the opening "Symphony For A Casket Full Of Nematodes" - a brutal lo-fi goregrind neo-classic with a solid riff and great blasts of noise and gurgles. Unfortunately the rest of the record doesn't hold up quite as strongly. Imagine really early cassette-deck Regurgitate (a la Concrete Human Torture) and you'll get the idea. Occasionally a RGTE-esque riff will really stand out ("Anatomophysiological Deterioration" for one) but there is a lot of slogging through the swamp until you hit the satisfactory closer "Enter The Realm Of Cadaver... Dissection." I really prefer the slower grooves over the blast beat nonsense (which ultimately becomes terribly tiring) and there's enough variation between the nearly forty 1-minute tracks to keep Stages Of Decomposition listenable. The duo behind Thanatopsis includes Neto from the forgettable Brazilian gorenoise outfit HxAxSx and Pelle  from the equally obscure (and I'm sure just as unpleasant) Swedish one-man grindshow Shitfaced. I'm actually curious as to whether the two guys made the trans-global flights to record together or if this was a collaborative email/snail mail effort. Either way it absolutely blows away anything either of them have done in the past and there are some other splits and comps featuring the band out there waiting for you to check out...

Play Possum

Choke Puke Slap Fuck

Banal brutal death grind from Budapest done exactly by the numbers yet for some weird reason it's not only listenable but mildly catchy for all the 10 minutes of their 2008 demo. Interestingly, the trio inexplicably re-recorded Meat as Meat 2.0 two years later - the latter sounds absolutely terrible in comparison (you can download it for free here) which goes to show a flashy production studio does little for a grind band's groove. Still, the guys eventually managed to release a full-length in 2013 which sounds exactly like you would expect it to... and their facebook page hasn't been updated since...

Letöltés

Hung Like A N-word

Oh boy, here's the post that will do me in with the PC police... Straight outta Nashville come the intentionally provocative-titled HxLxAxNx. So what does such a thematically witty band of Tennesseans sound like? Well, as far as brutal death metal goes it's not half bad, considering. Song titles are the typical stupid/offensive nonsense - I'm surprised in this day and age the joke got as far as it did (2 demos) - but at the end of it all the musick is fucking solid downtuned double bass drop slamcore chaos. Of course my headphones cringed at some of the level blasts but I appreciate the effort. Vocals are nonhuman unless you enjoy deciphering the gurgles of a pig - but if you've made it this far you know what to expect. Shit, next thing I'll find out is the band members are fucking ΣΑΕ alums... enjoy.

Horse Viagra Cock Trauma

Influences: Jalapeno Diarrhea Pain

Mildly witty band name aside, there's nothing wholly original from Finland's Brutanal other than the fact that there are a fucking ton of lyrics. Jesus - it seems like the guy never stops talking! I usually take my brutal death metal done by the books with a minimum of token gurgles and "ree's" - it seems like vocalist/guitarist Sir Josif Brutanal is determined to confess his manifesto in the most intricate detail possible. Sucks that I don't understand Finnish - the distortion is restrained just enough that you could probably make out what he is saying if you could speak the dialect. Oh well. Regarding the music, it's pretty tame tongue-in-check death metal (especially the silly "Fuck Jazz") that is replete with thrashcore-esque solos that would make Jeff Hanneman proud. They actually remind me sound-wise of what Anal Nosorog eventually turned into... not that that comparison means anything to anyone. Who knows if these guys are still around, they have a (circa 2009) Facebook page as well as a download one here (which offers their retarded 2005 demo as well). Actually, their Facebook page is worth a look simply for the unintentionally hilarious bio - broken English and all. All I gotta say is it sounds like they have one fucking hell of a live show. Cheers.

Woman! Fart! Now! Never Stop! Oh Yeah!

128kbps?!?!

Tacky band name notwithstanding, this unnecessarily long-titled 2011 promo from Isle Of Man brutal death metallers Condemn The Carnivore is actually really good. And that's coming from one jaded motherfucker. Twelve minutes of absolutely sick double-bass breakdown brutal riffage, the band's biggest hiccup is the fact that their songs sound like they were shittily ripped on someone's iPod nano wicked loud and equalized up to the highest level possible. The fucking hiss and treble twang on the cymbals is nearly unbearable. Really a shame too since this band may have had a chance in the primordial brutal death metal world - "Sculpture Of Severed Remnants" is simply fucking amazing. Re-up that shit on bandcamp fuckers!

Oink Oink Ree Oink

Stupid Sunday

Jesus, where to begin with this one. Fucking retarded two-song demo that I just stumbled upon and felt it necessary to share with the world. Introducing Chile's answer to Abominable Putrudity, the poorly-monikered Alien Parasite. Playing their brand of unsurprisingly generic "slamming suicidal death", the demo offers one quasi-listenable original entitled "Autopsy Rotten And Fermented The Reproductive Organs Of The Invasors" (I mean, really guys? C'mon...) and an Alien-esque cover of Mexican grinders C.A.R.N.E.'s "Use Your Cock." As expected, the opening movie samples (both lifted from Frank Henenlotter's classic Brain Damage) are as long as the broken-English song/album titles but the tired platitude of it all does give it some unintentional charm. Kinda like watching the Special Olympics. Enjoy.

Infested By Putrefaction And Virulent Alien Female Genitals

Gruesome Perversities

From their split CD with Brazil's goregrind lords Expurgo, here comes M.D.K. (Murder Death Kill), a more-than-ample three-piece shitting out a schizophrenic mix of gore, brutal death and grindcore. It unfortunately comes off a little complex (like you were playing Regurgitate and an Exit-13 album at exactly the same time) but it's well-produced and shit, it's only 17 minutes long. So bone up, pussy, and enjoy.

Nesga Moagem

Lesion

I've seen a lot of sick shit in my forty years, for fuck's sake I actually worked in a morgue for several of them, but the cover to Necrobios' 2008 debut takes the fucking cake. I don't know if it's the half-dozen kielbasas spurting from the blown-out asshole, the glaze of cum on the woman's face (and funnel of it pouring into her vage), or the smug hog overlooking the whole thing - it's just a grim, grim image. Bravo Photoshop, bravo. So how does the music stand up? Surprisingly, Патологические Изменения (which roughly translates into Pathological Changes per most reviews) is top-notch brutal death metal save for the stupid filler intro/outro techno tracks. Most of the tunes barely hit sixty seconds thankfully keeping the entire length of the album just under 15 minutes. Unlike some of their porngrind compatriots (I'm talkin' about you Proctalgia) who feel the need to pad an LP with seventy tracks and half an hour of samples, Necrobios keep it simple. The music is standard late 2000's deathgrind, very Happy Face-esque vocals with a solid breakdown in each song to keep all you bitter fucks content. "Rectal Blues" is the standout - seventy perfect seconds of gurgling slam. Enjoy.

Kielbasa

απερίγραπτος

Ridiculously technical brutal death metal from this amazingly talented Grecian three-piece. Insanely fast and wicked tight, The Coming Of The Ineffable reeks of an almost mechanical stench - so utterly perfect in execution that I wouldn't be surprised if it was all clandestinely created digitally by some GarageBand super geek. The vocals are mixed a tad too high but other than that there's little negative - the super sick breakdown at the end of "Enslaved In Somnium" is one of the best things I've heard in a while. Also dig the Giger-esque album cover. Happy Turkey Day.

Curb Free Thought

Cacodemonia

Pretty solid EP from obscure (and defunct) Michigan four-piece The Virally Enthroned. Fast as fuck technical brutal death metal recorded with a drum machine. The album doesn't really get going until the third track "Necrotic Desecration" - I'm fucking digging the brutal breakdown riff in the middle while the two vocalists trade off crust-style. Enough to satisfy your late afternoon metal-fix. Enjoy.

Catharsis

C.O.W.

Oh boy, here we go again. How can you turn down an album by a band called Raped By Pigs? Awesome moniker. These Peruvian brutal death metallers go through the motions on their debut EP and it's not all bad, when you get past the utterly nonsensical steamroller vocals (I mean really, are they just saying "reee reee" at this point?) there's definitely some sweet grooves behind all the posturing. "Fetalic Embryongenic Aberration" is amazing, especially the long breakdown at the end. The boys are still at it - a full-length due next week. Go figure.

Let Me Penetrate

Cuntpuncher

Mean-spirited deathcore/brutal death metal from Cologne, Germany. Awaiting The Fist is exactly what I want in heavy music: relentless riff-heavy slam with growly gutteral vocals. This little fucker of an e.p. starts off strong and does not quit for its 20-minute running time. The breakdown in "Postmortem Facefuck" is simply amazing. The band is still at it and their sound has evolved into a more "typical" brutal death metal groove, solid but nothing special. Check 'em out at their prime in 2008.

Beg For It

Brutal Death Satisfaction

Yeah, yeah, I know, another brutal death metal post. Going all the way back to 2007, NJ's mean-spirited Waking The Cadaver offers a solid debut album that easily rises above the offal usually floating in their genre. Perverse Recollections... is technically impressive and will competently satisfy even the more jaded riffhounds out there but it also reeks of a cool discordance that has kept my CD in regular rotation years after similar bands have bit the dust. And "Type A Secretor" is probably my favorite brutal track ever - that one alone makes this a keeper.

Pigtails Are For Face Fucking

Fun With Fudge

Man, for like six months in 2010 I had such a hard-on for brutal death metal - absolutely could not get enough of it. Big problem though - it gets real repetitive real fucking fast. There's only so much you can do when your guitar is fucking downtuned to C (strings just danglin' off the neck) and the vocals sound like the last time I ate Taco Cabana. Songs blur into one another without a single noticeable trait and before I knew it I found myself skipping any song on my iPod that started with some token horror movie sample. That being said, The Mung's Splatter Sessions rises a bit above the rest of the clichéd muck - tight riffs and a somewhat mixed approach to the usual excremental gurgling vocals. Solid sick splatter.

Oink Oink Oink Reeeeeee

Made The Cut...

Out of thirty-plus duds over the last week, Fetus Fucker's pretty amazing Nothing At A Long Awaited Moment In Monumental Slabs In Enclosed Walking Distances To Nothing (2006) graduated from the freshman team to varsity starter after a surprised listen. Who knows how I missed this one, maybe the band name filled my head with tired sugarplums of dull gurgling goregrind or I was just on my period that week but either way, this album fucking kills. Excellent production, clean and mean recordings, tight mastering... I was amazed to find out this is the lone project of one seriously talented dude. Hopefully the Tempe, AZ one-man band is still at it, checking out B.E.N.'s semi-updated myspace page it seems there are plans for future releases so let's keep our fingers crossed. THIS is the fucking way to do it fellas, if someone needs a "how-to" manual for all the various gore/cyber/death/grind machines out there, download this shit. And then fuck it all up. Enjoy.

Sold

Currently watching: Leatherface: The Texas Chainsaw Massacre III

Currently listening to: Suicide Silence The Cleansing

Hard Drive Deadbeats: BRUTAL DEATH METAL

It's strange, I usually work for at least a day or two on a typical 'Genocide post; neurotically double-checking to make sure my diatribes and anecdotes are as witty as possible. These "deadbeat" entries, on the other hand, are fucking writing themselves! Wow, it's so much easier to just say "this sucks" as opposed to waxing on and on trying to convince the rest of the world how to spend 50 minutes with a personal favorite. Go figure. Anyway, the icing on the putrid cake today are Dick's Ablation and Morbopraxis. While I admittedly am a fan of the somewhat new (or at least newly defined) subgenre of "brutal" death metal, there's only so much pig grunting I can stand. Especially if it is recorded like shit. Dick's Ablation (from their split CD with comparable stinkers Funeral Rape) go through the motions with typical mania but it just seems really empty. Each song blends into another with barely a change in chord or tempo, an incessant "ree-ree-ree" gluing the whole obscene calamity together. For what it's worth, it's barely par. Just so many other bands doing it a lot better. To be perfectly honest, I don't really have that much of a problem with Morbopraxis's two-song effort. For a demo it's passable (the songs fade out in a weird way though) but it's just so positively generic I can't bring myself to continue to acknowledge its existence. Sorry dudes.

Currently watching: Talhotblond

Currently listening to: Dystopia Dystopia

SOUNDS LIKE: Intestines And Excrement Gurgling Down A Plughole

Another "sickest and most brutal band ever" to emerge out of the slop and actually offer a little bit more than the generic status quo. UK's Amputated delight us with their piggish gurgles, solid breakdowns and witty generic movie samples. Well produced and a LOT better than most. Check out their new album and then buy it!

Oink

One for the kids....

Amazing "brutal slamming gore-soaked death metal" sophomore release by Norway's Kraanium. Better then most of the stuff I've heard lately in this getting-somewhat-too-saturated genre, The Art Of Female Sodomy delivers some really good grooves and huge breakdowns. They've got a few other releases/demos floating around out there on the blogs - or you could do the right thing and contact the band or their label for the goods. Either way, gurgle away bitches!!!

Ree-ree-ree-ree